Sunday, November 4, 2007

What's Next for me?

That is the question. Just thinking about the fact na HIV+ ano na kaya ang mangyayari sa kin? My friend told me na continue what I am doing which is working to get higher degree and just live a normal life. And I agree with her. I will live a normal life but with some considerations na. For example, if my normal life before involves sex with random guys, siguro now normal life would mean no sex or if meron naman, make sure the other concerned guy know about your health issues. Definitely, I will continue to get my diploma in higher education because this will be my ticket to future jobs here in the US.

My bestfriend told me that siguro nga di ka na dapat umuwi sa Pinas, because here you will be taken cared for especially that you have HIV. And I also agree with her. This is a turning point in my life na kung saan I have finally decided to stay here sa US instead of going back to Pinas. Sabi ko sa dalawa kong friends, I would go back to the Philippines para i-share ang mga natutunan ko dito sa US, but things have changed now, its about me na. Dati kse its about giving back. Anyways, im sure in my own way, I could still give back something sa Pilipinas eventhough I decided to stay here in the US for good.

But honestly, masakit sa loob ko na di na ako babalik ng Pilipinas, because I love the country so much. Masakit ang ginawa kong desisyon but I also have to consider myself this time. For the past several years, puro pagbibigay sa bayan ang ginagawa ko, siguro its about time na bigyan ko naman ng konting halaga ang natitira kong time dito sa mundo for myself.

Sya nga pala, baka may impression kayo na nagprogressed na ang HIV ko. Di pa ho. Matagal pa ang ilalagi ko dito sa mundo, but of course you can't help but think na bilang na bilang na ang mga araw mo.

7 comments:

Isaribi said...

While you are still alive, live your life to the fullest. Work if you must, party if you must. Let's chat sometimes. Would love to hear life from you. :)

AJ of Baklaako.com said...

True, it's very difficult to give to your country which doesn't give you anything back. I guess your decision not to come back here is good. You will be taken care of and accepted there. I think the problem with why people here tend to ostracize people who are HIV+ is because they are misinformed or uninformed about HIV.

Keep up the blog! p

pinoy_hivplus said...

thank you isaribi. i would love to chat with you sometime.
i agree with you aj. we still lack the education/information when it comes to HIV/AIDS. Mahina siguro ang NGO in their advocacy to inform the general populace about the disease. Nakakalungkot but it'll come, slowly nga lang.

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jakool said...

last week ko lang nalaman na hiv + ako. nag patest ako dahil mag aaply ako ng work abroad kilala kc ng kapatid ko yung agency na inaplyan ko. sure work na sana kaso di pala ako pede dahil nga positive nako. ngayon namumoblema ako dahil di ako makahanap ng work at natotroma ako na pag nagapply ako me hiv test dn sa company na inaaplayan ko. di ko alam gagawin ko!

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